Mastectomy Round II

I'm gearing up for my second mastectomy, why you might ask? because it reduces my risk of getting breast cancer on the right side by like 95% and I would like to see my kids grow up.  plus I would love to have more kids and I can't imagine how awful it would be to get pregnant and then find out I have breast cancer again.  so tonight I find myself making last minute babysitting arrangements with a knot in my stomach,  I know everything will be fine but I can't help having a few unsettled nerves before my surgery on Friday.  I don't remember my first mastectomy being too bad but I haven't decided if that's because I was so drugged up on pain killers that I just don't remember or if its because it was so soon after I finished chemotherapy that my brain cells hadn't recovered yet and there is a laps in my memory   or if nothing seems that bad when you've been thought what I've been through. or if it really wasn't that bad... it's hard to say. I guess I'll find out.